Redemption.

           Wow, so much has been happening in the past few months that I don't even know where to begin. I suppose that if I was a better blogger who kept up with her posts more often that I wouldn't have this problem, but then where would the fun in that be??? Hahaha. Anyway, I am just going to start off with where I am now and go from there. Whether that going is forwards, backwards, or some of both, I just don't know... ;-)
        So, Redemption. What does that word mean to you? What emotions, memories, and or feelings does it bring up in you? For me, I practically (and have in the past) tear up at the beauty of it. :-) Seriously, just take a moment and think about it. Think about what an amazing,  powerful,  gift of grace it is to us. To me, redemption is God taking all of our selfish, screwed up, nasty hopeless messes and turning them into a something so beautiful and powerful that ONLY He could possibly do. And that's NOT EVEN ALL OF IT!! He then uses those beauty from ashes stories in our own lives to inspire others to turn to Him and then have their OWN redemptive stories to tell!! This is powerful stuff, my friends. Powerful, awesome stuff from a powerful, awesome God. :-) Tell me, WHO ELSE could take all of our scars and hurts and turn them into beauty beyond imagining?? THAT IS THE GREATNESS OF OUR GOD. THE GREATNESS OF HIS LOVE FOR US!!! "As we run our hands along these scars, may they tell us who we are, WE ARE THE REDEEMED." - I LOVE love love this line from the song All the Same by 10th Ave North!! Our scars tell us who we are, but it's not that we are wounded messed up people, but that "we are the REDEEMED!!" God has redeemed us not only because of His infinite love for us, but because He has chosen us (US!!!) to go and help Him in his redemptive work that He is doing in the world. Our relationships, our lives, our stories, are that much powerful because of what He has done in our lives!!
      This all makes me think of Edmund and Eustace from the Chronicles of Narnia and how their redemption through Aslan not only affected them, but it dramatically changed the lives of those around them as well. Their stories illustrate the truth of Romans 8:28 in a way that we can understand and relate to. Their stories also show that while the journey to redemption is never easy, it is ALWAYS WORTH IT. :-)

My Best Friend's Wedding ;-)

Disclaimer: This blog post has nothing to do with Julia Roberts, Cameron Diaz, or trying to unsuccessfully break up a wedding...but it still has pics of people who are all HOT HOT HOT especially the beautiful bride!! (but not because it was 104 degrees outside or anything...) ;-)

So once upon a time there was this girl who met this boy and they both played ultimate frisbee at college together. The boy was entranced by the girl's laugh, asked her out and they fell in love and (6 yrs later) they decide to get married!!! So as one of the lifelong best friends of this girl, I had the honor of being invited to be in the wedding as one of the bridesmaids!!! :-) So here are some pics from their big day! 

My nails that I got done for the wedding! :-)

Bridesmaids' Luncheon :-)

Rehearsal Dinner

Getting our hair done for the BIG DAY! :-)

Reception Area!

Our bouquets! :-)

Getting our makeup done by our fabulous friend Katelyn! :-)

IT'S ALMOST TIME!!! :-)

First Dance as Husband & Wife :-)

All the girls!! It's been a few years since middle & high school, but we're still going strong! :-)

         

A Summation of My Life So Far This Year. :-)

"Trust in the Lord and do good." -- Believe Him and obey what He says.
"Dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness." -- Be on mission where He has called you, not seeking another place/vocation/service/opportunity.
"Delight yourself in the Lord." -- Enjoy Him and rejoice in being His. Love Him for Himself alone!
"And He will give you the desires of your heart." -- A life of obedient, contented delight in Jesus brings heart-satisfying gifts from God.
"If you know these things, you are blessed if you do them."
(Psalm 37:3-4; John 13:17)

I copied this off a friend's status on facebook back awhile ago and I've got it on a post-it note on my desktop background on my computer. I absolutely love it!! It's so encouraging and TRUTH-FILLED. :-) Plus, I don't think that you could sum up everything that God has been doing in my life this year any better than this!! And one of these days, I might actually write a real blog post about all that's been going on. Haha. Ooops. Love y'all!:-)

A God-given Beach Trip! :-)

            Wow!! I knew that it had been awhile since I had gotten on here to write, but I didn't realize that it had been this long!! haha. Oh well. However, I do have some fun things to share!! The week of Father's Day we ended up taking a spontaneous trip to the beach!! It was great! The whole thing was a great gift from God that we all definitely needed!! In a few hours we went from having no plans for the next week to having decided to go, securing a fabulous beach house, and getting off of work! And that's quite a story there too! We are supposed to request off at least a week in advance and then we have to be one of the 1st two people to ask off to get approved. I went in and explained how I literally had just found out going right before I came in and so they looked it up in the computer and NO ONE at all had asked off! So then I just had to find someone to sub for me before I left that evening! Well the lady at the office says, "Why don't you ask so-and-so?" and then literally 30 seconds later, SHE WALKS UP!! I ask her about it and sure enough, she can do it! Now IS THAT GOD OR WHAT??  Then we get to the beach and the weather is soo GORGEOUS! ABSOLUTELY PERFECT!!! We've been going there for practically my whole life (I've been there about 20 or so times) and this was the nicest weather that we had ever seen!! (Especially for md-June!!) It was sunny, hardly any clouds, 82, and low humidity the whole week!! I ended up getting sunburnt because it was too chilly in the shade with the breeze that was blowing!! But enough of my yakking, let's get to the pictures, right?? Oh and if you notice an extra person in them, that's because I was able to talk GraceAnne into coming too!! :-)

 YAAAAY!!! WE'RE AT THE BEACH!!!
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Haha! Gotta love my face here!!! ------------->

 Why yes, that is a pool behind our house for the week!! :-)
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 She's so excited and she just can't hide it!! :-)
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Harbor Town!!! :-)
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Take Heart

My life's anthem right now! :-)

 

There is a light
It burns brighter than the sun
He steals the night
And casts no shadow
There is hope
Should oceans rise and mountains fall
He never fails
 

So take heart
Let His love lead us through the night
Hold on to hope
And take courage again
In death by love
The fallen world was overcome
He wears the scars of our freedom
In His Name
All our fears are swept away
He never fails
 

All our troubles
And all our tears
God our hope
He has overcome
 

All our failure
And all our fear
God our love
He has overcome
All our heartache
And all our pain
God our healer
He has overcome

All our burdens
And all our shame
God our freedom
He has overcome

All our troubles
And all our tears
God our hope
He has overcome

All our failures
And all our fear
God our love
He has overcome

God our justice
God our grace
God our freedom
He has overcome

God our refuge
God our strength
God is with us
He has overcome!!!

"Take Away the Stone"

Thoughts from my devotions - 5/15/2012
John 11:4- This sickness will not end in death. No it is for God's glory, so that God's Son may be glorified through it."
v.39- How often is it that when God gives us a simple command (such as "Take away the stone") and yet we reply as Martha did, "But, Lord....." adding in our own objections or justifications of why that won't work or isn't a good idea, rather than saying, "Yes, Lord." and doing it? Why is it that our gut instinct is to question His commands rather than responding in obedience, trusting that since He is God and we are NOT, He (gasp) knows better than us and is more than likely giving us the chance to take off our garments of mourning and participate in the resurrection of someone/something? Do we really believe that He is who He says He is or not? Do we truly want to see His glory revealed to us or not? Participating in His Great Adventure is risky and does cost a lot, but the rewards of the adventure are astronomically greater than any risk that we will have to undertake.

Between Your Past and A Promise

This is the verse that I believe that God has been speaking over this season of my life right now. It's simultaneously scary & exciting! It can also be hard.I've really been struggling with the command in verse 18 and it seems to me that I am not the only one with this problem. The Israelites themselves struggled with this as well in Numbers 14:4, when at the discouraging report of the 10 spies said, "We should go back to Egypt." At first glance we might think that they are crazy for wanting to go back to slavery in Egypt when God had just delivered them out of bondage (and they were only days away from the Promised Land), but how often do we react the same way? Rather than pressing into what God has promised to us, we decide to stay where we are/go back to what we know because while it may not be the greatest, most stellar circumstances, (or even if it is great circumstances, which makes the decision not go back even harder) we know what to expect. It's familiar. It's comfortable. It doesn't require us to step out in faith. It doesn't require all of us. There is little to no risk involved. As the band Casting Crowns puts it:

 "With eyes wide open to the differences, the God we want and the God who is, will we trade our dreams for His or are we caught in the middle?" So, the question that has to be answered is, "Are we going to be brave enough to step out in faith and claim the promises that God has given us (knowing that there will be struggles and challenges, but with those challenges comes incredible blessings and faith-building opportunities) or are we going to continue to dwell in the past?" He is doing a NEW thing!!! Let's rise up and meet it with great expectations!!

Verse 14 has become my mantra lately... Agggghh...Waiting is definitely not my favorite lesson to be learning, that's for sure! I keep reminding myself that the end result will be so worth it, but it's like being disciplined...even when you know it's for your own good, it still doesn't make it any more enjoyable, which is why I am believing in the promises from Psalm 37:2-7 (as well as many others) to get me through this time of waiting and learning patience. :-)

Overcoming Obstacles through Obedience

       Wow...how has it already been a month since I last posted anything?? It is just crazy how time flies by sometimes! It seems that even though not a whole lot has been happening (schedule-wise) in my life lately, I am still exhausted from everything has been going on spiritually in my life. God has just been at it, teaching, teaching, teaching, and while it is incredibly awesome, it is also at times incredibly exhausting...Dying to yourself to be able to come alive in Him is definitely never easy and anyone who ever tries to tell you otherwise has obviously never truly tried/surrendered anything to Him. I know that might sound harsh to some, but it is the truth, and I can say that because I was once one of those people myself. If it's not hard, then it's not surrender. (At least in my book.) "Well if it's so hard, then why bother?", some might say. To them I would say, "While it is hard, it is something that I work towards on a daily basis because while surrender is an incredibly hard and scary thing, the thought of what would happen to me/what I would miss out on is infinitely scarier." God is up to something big and I want to make sure that I don't miss out on it.
      I want to make sure that I am one of the Joshua's and Caleb's of the world, not one of the other 10 who caused the Israelites to doubt, disobey, and end up wandering the desert for 40 years. I want to believe in God's promises and know that there will be struggles because of those promises, but that they are something that God will overcome as I walk in obedience to Him. I want to see barriers as an opportunity for God to show up and do one of His amazing God-things. I need to remember that God's promise is attached to His provision, and that oftentimes His provision will not show up in the way that I expect it to. I am reminded of the scene from Prince Caspian when the Pevensies announce to Trumpkin that they are the help that Aslan has sent and Trumpkin doesn't believe them because they look like mere kids to him, and he was expecting great warriors. I am also reminded of a people who spent hundreds and even thousands of years waiting for a Messiah to come and save them, and yet when He came, most did not believe it was Him because He did not fit their preconceived ideas of what and who the Messiah was going to be and do. 
    Lord, I pray that we would not be so blinded by our preconceived notions and ideas of who You are and what You are wanting us to do that we miss out on all that You have planned for us. I pray that we would be like the sheep in John 10 who know the Good Shepherd's voice and that we would listen to and follow Your voice as You lead us in our lives. In Your Precious Holy Name, Amen. :-)

Cracking Up at a Crosswalk...

      So this past weekend I was privileged to be able to travel to Savannah, GA for a childhood friend's wedding . :-) It was beautiful as always, but I was especially stoked about the fact that Mom and Dad were kind enough to go over to Tybee Island with me so that I could spend a few hours on the beach!!  (Since I didn't get to go with them this past summer because I was out in Seattle working.) However, one of the most meaningful parts of the weekend for me was Saturday evening as we were walking from where the wedding had been held to the restaurant where the reception was going to be. It was just a couple blocks away, but there was this one major intersection that we had to cross to get there, so a bunch of us all ended up standing there on the corner together. So let me paint the picture of this for you-- you know how when you are standing at a crosswalk, they have the WALK and DON'T WALK symbols as well as the button that you press to let it know that you are waiting to cross? Ok, Well this one not only had all that, but it spoke too....Oh yes! We are standing there when suddenly, I realize that I am hearing this voice coming from the crosswalk box. And it says, "Wait.....wait.....wait.....wait.....wait.....wait.....wait.....wait.....wait...." and all of a sudden I realize, you know what??? This is the exact perfect illustration of my life right now!! Then I just started cracking up, laughing out loud at the fact that God had just spoken to me using crosswalk box. Hahaha. I just love how God breaks out into the ordinariness of our lives to speak to us in memorable and extraordinarily creative ways!! :-) HE IS JUST THE COOLEST EVER!! I love you, Jesus!! :-) Thanks for always being there for me! Help me to continue to delight in Your Presence...You are so amazing, full of glory, and worthy of honor. It is in You that we live and move and have our being. Continually draw us towards You and Your love. Guide us, teach us, lead us. It's in Your Precious Holy Name that we pray this. Amen. :-)

Doubts & Reassurance

"I remind myself of all that you've done, and the life I've had because of Your Son. Love came down and rescued me, Love came down and set me free, I am Yours, I am forever Yours. Mountains high, Valley low, I sing out and remind my soul that I am Yours, I am forever Yours. I am Yours, I am Yours, all my days, Jesus, I am Yours." ~Kari Jobe

"I know that You are for me, I know that You are for me, I know that You will never forsake me in my weaknesses, I know that You have come down, even if to write upon my heart, to remind me of who You are." ~Kari Jobe

          If we are consistently finding ourselves in a place of doubt or worry and needing reassurance, we need only to return our focus to Jesus, to reflect on who scripture says that He is as well as  to look back on what He has done in our own lives up to this point. He has been faithful, He is faithful, and He will continue to be Faithful. He's got it, so I don't need to. He'll work it out if it's meant to be worked out, otherwise all the manipulating in the world won't change the outcome and oftentimes will just make it worse by our meddling. I have really had to rely on the Spirit's strength inside of me lately for this very thing because I am such an initiative, take charge type of person that I often run ahead of everyone else involved including God. Again, this goes back to that whole learning to see the beauty in the process. That is definitely the major theme in my life lately. The first 3 months of the year, it was seeing life's interruptions as divine interventions and learning to be obedient and submissive in that, and now it seems that we have moved into this new theme of not just seeing, but enjoying the beauty of the process. Anyway, God gave me this really cool vision/picture in my head as I was having one my own little "I need to be in control" freak-outs. Well, not quite a freak out, but hopefully you get my drift... ;-)
      In this vision, I could see myself sitting in my car and I'm driving around without a GPS and in a strange and unfamiliar place that I have not been in before without the slightest clue of where I am, where I am going, or how to get there. And God is sitting there next to me saying, "Julia, you seem to really like pressing that gas pedal, but it's not doing you any good, because you do not know where you are going. Let me help you. First, I need you to put your foot on the brake, put the car in park, get out and switch sides with me. I know exactly where you are going, what route you need to take, what stops need to be made on the way, etc. I don't need a GPS, but I planned this route out for you long before you were born, and while I may not always drive the speed that you would like me to go, I promise that for each portion of our trip together, it will be the exactly right speed that you need, so that  you will arrive exactly when you are supposed to, not too soon and not too late either. Also, go ahead and enjoy the journey and the scenery. Appreciate the beauty of the process." The great part about these pictures that He gives me is that I can sit there in my mind and visualize stopping the car, getting out, and going around to sit in the passenger seat. It's a visual surrender that says, "God, I am choosing to trust You in this, please guide in the path that You have laid out for me." (So hard, but so worth it.) :-)

Waiting.

      You know how when you've been waiting on something for so long that as long as it's still somewhere off in the indefinable distance you are perfectly fine to wait, but as soon as it seems as it might be coming nearer and possibly somewhat attainable you lose all semblance of patience and find yourself wanting to imitate a Nascar driver? Pedal to the medal, baby!! Bring it on! Yet in the midst of me wanting to slam that gas pedal to the floor, God is saying to me, "Hold on there, beloved. I still have things that I want to teach you and show you about yourself in this season...This isn't a free-for-all and you're not on the autobahn, so just slow back down and keep your eyes on me. I've brought you this far, I'm going to abandon you mid-ship. After all, I am faithful and true and I will never leave you or forsake you. Rest in me and I will see you through."
Again, it all comes down to TRUST. So, Jesus, once again, I am choosing to trust in You, in Your plans, in Your faithfulness, in Your love for me. Thank you for your grace, mercy, and never-ending patience. You are worthy God, Thank You. Help me continue to know and love you more each day. In Your Precious Holy Name, Amen.

The Beauty of the Process...

     So I just finished doing Beth Moore's new Bible study on James and let me just tell you, it is phenomenal!! If you have to chance to be able to do it, I would highly recommend it! I feel like I could spend a whole week just talking about everything that I learned/God taught me through those 10 or so weeks. :-) However, there's a phrase from her last video session that I wanted to mention today. As she's tying up the study, she mentions how we need to be able to slow down and enjoy "the beauty of the process." She then goes on to talk about how she knew at 18 that God was calling her into some kind of ministry, but that it wasn't until she 34 that God led her to what she is doing now. I found this greatly encouraging, since as a 25 year old, 3 years out of college, I had been feeling frustrated and somewhat like a failure lately because I could not seem to figure out what it was that God was preparing me for in my life. Little did I know that this phrase was to become the describing phrase of my life lately. God seems determined to get me to sit down, take my hands off any and every situation, and just enjoy the beauty of the process...Although I have to say that I haven't been particularly enjoying it, I know that He is sure is teaching me quite about myself through this all.
       And what have I learned about myself? Well, for one, I don't particularly care to step back and enjoy the beauty of the process when there is an unknown outcome involved. I like to have a plan and everything thought out and planned out ahead of time. I came to realize this as I was pondering why I love the beauty of the process when it comes to sight-seeing, but any other time it drives me crazy. It's because when I am sight-seeing, I am in charge, and I will have a map, a plan/route, and a destination. I can relax and enjoy the journey because I know where it is taking me and where I'm going to end up eventually. The ironic part? There are a great many similarities between what I just described about sight-seeing and how life really is, the only difference is that God is the only one that knows the plan, the directions, the details, and the destination. While this is greatly reassuring, it can also be greatly frustrating because He only shares information on a need-to-know-as-you-go-one-step-at-a-time basis. At times, I am grateful for this, other times not so much. (This is probably also why I prefer to read novels that are written in 3rd person omniscient because then I am not left wondering what someone is thinking, because I already know.) I like details. I want to know details. 
    But thank the Lord for His goodness in not telling me details most of the time and protecting me from myself. It may be driving me crazy now, but I know that when I look back on this, I will be so thankful that I only knew what I needed to know, and that I didn't know everything that I wanted to know. I guess that that's really what learning to enjoy the beauty of the process is all about...it's about recognizing that I don't need to know everything beforehand and that it IS ok to just let go and wait and see what God does with it all. It is then that I realize that perhaps I am not quite as patient as I would like to think I am. But that is a post for next time... ;-)

Update: I just found this as I was scrolling through my fb page, it's from earlier in the study, but it definitely fits so well here- "...try as you may, you can't rush training. Really, what I meant to say was this: you can't rush God. You can't push Him. You can't pull Him. You can't tug Him or taunt Him. If He has a mind to linger right where He is you can't budge Him one inch. You can, however, try to go without Him; but chances are, you'll come back because, if you really have a heart for God, you'll be miserable beyond His blessing."

"Why do you look for the living among the dead?"

HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE!!! :-) He is RISEN! He is risen INDEED! I hope that y'all had a fantastic day! I don't know about you, but wow, I have been so enjoying the incredible weather this weekend! What a wonderful gift from God! :-) Anyway, I just wanted to share a couple Easter things with you. First was that church today was AWESOME!! :-) Not only was the music and the message great, but they had this awesome video that pretty much tells the Easter story as if you were watching it happen on Twitter. It's pretty cool and refreshing and relevant way to get the message of the Easter story out there to those who don't know/understand why we celebrate this super important holiday. The movie is called Follow. Second of all, I got to make Easter baskets for my brother Chris and my sister Rachel and I thought that they turned out super cute, so here's the pics to see for yourselves:

haha! Awesomness!! :-)

Feeling a lot like Mary...

"But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart" ~Luke 2:19

I'm sure that most everyone who has heard the Christmas story read out of Luke recognizes this verse, you may even pretty much have it memorized because you have heard it so many times over the years. But do you really understand what it is that it is saying? I know that up until recently, I didn't. For many years it was just one of those verses that I sort of got, but at the same time, I was never really sure what exactly Luke was saying either. Then one day back about month and half or two months ago, I was talking to a friend and trying to explain to her everything that God had been doing in my life and in my heart, but I just couldn't seem to find the words to convey exactly what it was that I wanted to say. It was quite frustrating to say the least, but as I was thinking about it later, I realized that I was never fully going to be able to convey the depth of the change that God had been bringing about in me, b/c it was all inner heart stuff. So, for that person to even begin to understand where I was coming from, they would've had to pretty much become a part of me so that they could know my heart in the way that no one else besides you and God does. (which is obviously not possible.) Then all of a sudden, it hit me! BAM! Right upside the head. "This must be what the Bible is talking about when it says that Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in heart." After all, when God is doing some major heart work on you, there is so much going on inside of you that most of the time all that you can do is to treasure it up and ponder it in your heart. So that is what I have spent most of the first part of this year doing, being stretched, taught, challenged, humbled, convicted, blessed, and then treasuring up all these lessons and pondering them in my heart. It's been an absolutely extraordinary time, and I know that I will never be the same b/c of it. Has it been hard and at times, exhausting? Yes. But has it been totally worth it? Definitely YES. :-)

 

Where do I even begin??

       Wow! It has been so long and so much has happened since I was last on here, I don't even know if I know where to begin...I guess first of all, I should say that I am back living in the United States and have been since a week after my last blog post. Wow...when I posted that one, I had absolutely no idea what was to come my way in those next few days! What happened was that I was suddenly and unexpectedly faced with the crisis of not having anywhere to live after the middle of January and after crying out desperately out to God asking Him what on earth it was that He was wanting me to do, I heard Him speak more clearly to me than I had ever heard Him speak before. The only problem?? It wasn't exactly what I wanted to hear. Actually, to tell the truth, it was really the opposite of the answer that I was looking for. (Funny how that works, isn't it? We cry out, begging to hear from God and yet when He answers, we oftentimes get mad b/c it wasn't the answer that we were wanting to hear/had already scripted for Him to say.) So what was His answer? TWO WORDS. Two little words. "GO BACK." And that was it. No explanation, no room for budging, no anything. Just "go back." So now I was faced with a choice, was I going to obey or was I going to fight it? Well, as much as everything in me wanted to fight it, I knew that I had to obey. After all, living in another country trying to do ministry without God's blessing on me seemed about the dumbest thing to ever to try and attempt. So instead of packing up my Christmas presents and a week's worth of clothes into a suitcase to go home for a quick visit,  I had to make what has had to have been one of the (if not the most) hardest decisions of my life AND I had to try and fit ALL of my clothes and stuff PLUS all my Christmas presents into 50lbs or less of luggage and drag it all home with me. Joy. It was definitely not the way that I was wanting to start the holidays, that is for sure. However, even in the midst of my obedient misery, it was neat to be able to see the progress that I had made, even over the past few months in my walk with God. The fact that I had decided to obey, rather than fighting/arguing about it before I was forced into obeying was a big step forward for me. And I can still say now what I said then: "It was definitely the right decision to make. Insanely hard, but definitely right." God has worked in me and spoken to me so much through the past few months that it has just been absolutely incredible. Incredibly exhausting at times, but still incredible. Super hard at times, but still super good. Do I miss England and all my friends there? Absolutely. However, I know that I am where God has placed me and I am learning to be content in that. :-) God is enough, in fact, He is more than enough, it's just a matter of us continually remembering that fact and resting in His presence. More stories to come! :-)